My Prayer

My Prayer

Dear Jesus,

Thank you for saving my life. Thank you for never letting go of me and for lifting me out of my troubles. Where will my help come from? No one could save me. Only you had the answers to all my questions.

Thank you for showing me that the voice of anorexia/bulimia had nothing to do with me and that I am beautiful and perfect in your eyes. Thank you for exposing the intentions and existence of a/b and for providing me with specific available people who knows and loves you, people who made themselves available to your service.

The pain of guilt, self-hatred and self-rejection was unbearable and the voice of a/b used this to seduce me to obey all of its commands. It told me that I was alone and that no one cared for me, except for a/b. It told me that even you rejected me and that the only reason that I’m alive is to suffer for my guilt and shame. It told me that I’m a good for nothing and that I was worth nothing, a BIG FAT ZERO! So, I believed that I needed a/b to help me cope with this nightmare called “Life”. It made me believe that I could have pleasure through pain and that pain was good. Death is good, and isolation and secrecy is power.

But he lied!!! He always deceives!

You Jesus have made me in your image and likeness and I understand this to mean that I am special, very special. You showed me that I am loved and loved unconditionally. Today I know that I am not alone. Thank you Jesus!!

You teach me every day how to fight back against a/b and you rescue me every time a/b’s assault becomes too great. A/B is too strong and too smart for the average person, but not for you. You showed ma again today that you are in control and that a/b doesn’t stand a chance when you get involved.

Please don’t forget about the thousands of others people in the prison of anorexia/bulimia. Please open their eyes to your truth and the real truth about a/b. Please help everyone to see that a/b is not a friend. It doesn’t care for anyone but himself and that all he wants is to exist even if it means killing its host. Please show these people the same love and grace which you have shown me.

I have humbled myself before you and have asked for forgiveness for everything I have done against your love for me. You heard me and forgave me. You accepted me into your garden and held me in your arms. You gave me hope and reason to live, reason to love and reason to trust. Thank you for this freedom and grace.

I love you Jesus!